The following email was forwarded to me by an author.

Richard Curtis

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My Dear Miss Klimstrock,

I’m writing to tender an apology for my intemperate outburst in response to your email greeting me as “Hey, Pat.”  I have been aware for some time that the Internet tends to dissolve formalities but I did not realize that things had progressed quite so far.

I assure you that I usually have far better control over my impulses but perhaps you can appreciate that, given my title and social position, I am accustomed to being addressed Milord or Sir. In the circles in which I was raised, familiarity by peers and indeed even intimate friends is considered shockingly vulgar. Thus, to be addressed “Hey” by a perfect stranger was so alien to my fundamental sense of respect and dignity that I momentarily forgot that the civilized ladies and gentlemen who once populated the publishing profession have been replaced by ignorant and uncouth ragamuffins who speak to one another in grunts, slang and monosyllabic code and send texts in incomprehensible shorthand. I would not have guessed, however, that such liberties are now extended to authors and perfect strangers.

I hasten to assure you that these derogatory remarks are not directed at you specifically, Miss Klimstrock. I also wish to make it clear that I am not reacting spitefully to your rejection of my submission, though I confess that the crudeness of your expression and illiteracy of your spelling and grammar did fuel the rage that compelled me to write my regrettably childish outburst of spleen before I could gain control of my emotions.

Hard as it is, I know I must reconcile myself to the common parlance of the modern world. I realize that we no longer live in an age when we saluted our correspondents with such phrases as “Your Excellency” and Esteemed Madame” or even “Dear Author” and I will endeavor to adjust to the usages of the 21 century, however offensive they may be to the well-bred.

I will remit a cheque for the return of my manuscript.

Believe me to be very truly yours,

Patrick Marley-Clockbridge, Third Earl of Crumfleath

In the 1970′s the writing team of George E. Simpson and Neal R. Burger wrote a series of gripping thrillers that are as vibrant and compelling as the day they were published. E-Reads is proud to bring them back, starting with Fair Warning, which Kindle Select will carry exclusively until mid-August 2012, For the first five days of its publication it is FREE anyone with a Kindle. The Promotion will start on the  17th of May and end on the 21st.

In Fair Warning America is set to finally end World War II with a devastating act–dropping the atomic bomb over Japan. But what if a secret mission was set in place to alter the course of history? In this fast-paced and imaginative thriller, the authors strike a brilliant chord between what was, and what might have been.

It is July 1945. Germany has surrendered, and the U.S. is poised for one last surge against the Japanese. Under pressure from both the press and the Washington politicos, Secretary of War Henry Stimson launches a mission so secret, not even the President knows. Dubbed Operation Big Stick, it is a subversive plot to warn the Japanese and get them to surrender. Charged with leading the daring mission is Captain Patrick Snyder, an impulsive, smart-talking intelligence officer, who fears what failure will bring, not only to himself, but to the entire world.

Stay tuned at E-Reads for news of other thrillers by this remarkable team.

She was his first love and he was willing to overlook her imperfections at the time. Though she could be charming, cultured and articulate, she was also dowdy and old-fashioned in tweeds and sensible shoes, unworldly and inclined to tedious intellectualism. But she was richly endowed and ripe for the plucking, And pluck her he did, first seducing her, then playing fast and loose with her heart, tormenting her with infidelities as he relieved her of her fortune.

Then he found a new fascination, charismatic, classy, fashionable and rich. He succumbed to her irresistible allure. Only one question remained: Would he throw his first love over?

This is the metaphor that may have occurred to some Amazon-watchers when they read that the behemoth retailer is launching an initiative in the high-end clothing business that resonates with its original efforts to revolutionize publishing.

“Having wounded the publishing industry, slashed pricing in electronics and made the toy industry quiver,” Stephanie Clifford wrote in the New York Times, ”Amazon is taking on the high-end clothing business in its typical way: go big and spare no expense…In the retail clothing world, fears are growing that few will be able to compete with a stepped-up Amazon.”

Though we in the book industry consider our little corner of the media to be glamorous, compared to the fashion field it is lackluster, unsophisticated and impecunious. Looking at it through the eyes of a shrewd businessman, the profit margin on high-end sales – even with free shipping and returning – beggar those of the book industry.”Gross profit dollars per unit will be much higher on a fashion item,”said Amazon founder Jeff Bezos, one of the shrewdest businessmen on the face of the Earth. Bezos was Honorary Chairman at the glam opening of a classic costume exhibit at the Metropolitan Museum. See New York Social Diary for photos of him with Vogue fashionista empress Anna Wintour.

Will the more precious commodity drive the cheaper one of Bezos’s attentions and affections? Keeping our Eternal Triangle metaphor in mind, read the Times‘s article and judge for yourself. Amazon Leaps Into High End of the Fashion Pool

Richard Curtis

What do a cunning old man, a code-slopper gone rogue, a pair of lowlife tech-runners, a sexually frustrated AI, and a hermaphrodite underworld boss have in common? They’re all out to get Benito Funcitti, owner of the first lunar resort: Fun City. Oh, who’s that old man? He’s Benito Funcitti too, thanks to a TeleCompositor “accident”  that left behind a double who shouldn’t exist.

With two Benitos squaring off, the adventure is sure to include daring, fun, and maybe a little something on the side.

The Man in the Moon Must Die, Jeff Bredenberg’s classic of 1980s cyberpunk, has been refurbished for modern audiences, presenting an image of the near future that’s both divergent and immediate.

On a January afternoon in 1893, men hunkered down behind sandbagged emplacements in the streets of Honolulu, with rifles, machine guns and cannon ready to open fire. Troops and police loyal to the queen of the sovereign nation of Hawaii faced off against a small number of rebel Honolulu businessmen–American, British, German, and Australian. In between them stood hundreds of heavily armed US sailors and marines. Just after 2.00 p.m., the first shot was fired, and a military coup began.

This is the true, tragic and at times amazing story of the 1893 overthrow of Queen Liliuokalani of Hawaii and her government. It’s also the story of a five-year police state regime in Hawaii following the overthrow, and an attempted counter-coup by Hawaiians in 1895. And of how Hawaii became a US possession.

In Taking Hawaii, award-winning author Stephen Dando-Collins (Standing Bear is a Person, Legions of Rome, Tycoon’s War) reveals previously little-known facts uncovered during years of research on several continents, in the most dramatic and comprehensive chronicle of the end of Hawaii’s monarchy ever published. Using scores of first-hand accounts, this often minute-by-minute narrative also shows for the first time how the queen’s overthrow teetered on a knife-edge, only to come about purely through bluff.

Taking Hawaii reads like an exciting novel. Yet this tale of a grab for power, of misjudgment and injustice, truly took place. Judge for yourself whether you think the queen of Hawaii was wronged, or was wrong.

Visit the Stephen Dando-Collins website for a complete list of dramatic histories of Roman Legions and other distinguished nonfiction works.  And for an inspiring fictional tale of a Roman investigator on whose judgment the success or doom of the cult known as Christianity depended, you must read The Inquest.

No no no, you dimwit, not those loins!

A confession.

Like anybody else launching a writing career, I was not very particular about what I wrote as long as I got paid for it.  That is why I wrote half a dozen sex novels. They were a great way to learn fictional skills, they paid well, the publisher never asked for editorial fixes, and as long as I did not cross certain lines of taste the publisher would accept everything I produced. In those days that line was No Explicit Body Parts, No Clinical Terms for Intercourse, and No Dirty Words. That’s why sex novels in those days were weak tea compared to the hot erotica in even the average romance published today.  I was so good at writing sex scenes that I was occasionally asked by the publisher to “sex up” a drab and unimaginative scene written by another author.

For that reason, I feel confident that it will be no loss for me to pass up the opportunity to attend the Creative Writing in the 21st Century conference  this coming weekend in Toronto, where one of the presentations is entitled “He put his what, where? Or: How to teach students to write plausible sex scenes, prevent them from winning the Bad Sex Fiction Award, while not suffering from fear, alarm, dread, or embarrassment in the process.”.

Quill & Quire interviewed the pair (both female) of creative writing teachers conducting the course, and you will find the Q&A candid and refreshingly funny.

For instance, asked what inspired them to broach the delicate topic of scx scenes in their class, they replied “I think the trigger for us was the contest for the worst sex scene. There are so many writers that I admire who write terrible sex scenes. A lot of them, even if they’re not violent or offensive, are just really boring: he put his thing there, and she stroked this, he moaned, and he said, ‘Oh baby, baby.’”

For the complete interview click on Creative writing Q&A: Nicole Markotic on the delicate art of teaching sex scenes.

And if you don’t remember what contest they’re talking about, read Bad Sex Award Is Coming.  Oh God Oh God Yes Yes Yes It’s Coming!

Richard Curtis

http://ereads.com/ecms/book_title/Snow-Job

Fans of Canadian police chief Reid Bennett have waited a long, long time for all ten thrillers in Ted Wood’s series to be back under one roof. Oddly, we had #s 1 through 7 plus 9 and 10, but the eighth, Snowjob, had met with production delays.  But that’s all behind us: Snowjob is back in print and the series is now complete.  And if you’re worried about Bennett’s German Shepard sidekick Sam, don’t be – he’s back too.

The faithful companion is still by his side in a case that takes them across the border to Chambers, Vermont, where an old buddy needs Reid’s help.

Doug Ford, a black policeman in the all-white town, has been charged with murdering the attractive bookkeeper of a local ski resort. Only Reid believes Doug’s story that he and the woman were working together to investigate an entrenched money laundering conspiracy. But, as new bodies pile up and the Mafia rears its ugly head, things start to fall in line with Doug’s story. Can Reid untangle the mystery before more blood gets shed? He’ll have to act fast–an unseen hand seems willing to stop at nothing to keep its secrets safe.

Intense action, sinister prejudices, and duty to old friends make for another attention-grabbing thriller from Canada’s favorite crime author, Ted Wood.

Nine other Reid Bennetts await you. Visit Ted Woods’ author page to see them all.

Elizabeth A. Lynn stands as a ground-breaking author of fantasy and science fiction. Her stories weave richly-drawn characters and complex scenes of daily life into the intricate tapestry of speculative fiction. But, beyond her technical skill, Lynn has changed the landscape of fantasy writing as one of the first authors to incorporate themes of gender and gay relationships into her work. Importantly, these themes are not part of the fantastic storyline but simply part of the unremarkable, normal relationships around which the fantasy occurs.

The Woman Who Loved the Moon, a deeply felt collection of Lynn’s early short stories, serves as a wonderful introduction to her influential work. Soaring emotions, eloquent prose, and fully-realized worlds are truly a joy to become lost within. That explains why the namesake short story “The Woman Who Loved the Moon” won Lynn one of her two World Fantasy Awards.

With The Woman Who Loved the Moon, readers will delight in an author whose work George R.R. Martin has described as “the sort of fantasy we don’t see enough of: lyrical and literate, and a treat from the first page to the last.”

For other great books by Lynn, including her other World Fantasy Award winner, Watchtower, visit her author page.

Sourcebooks’s Vice President and Editorial Director Todd Stocke issued a bulletin to colleagues in the publishing industry reporting record-breaking sales and exciting initiatives in the traditional and digital space.  Coming just before Book Expo America convenes, it will certainly burnish the company’s reputation as an industry leader.

The text is below, but not hotlinked.

Richard Curtis

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Dear Friends -

Two weeks ago I watched our accounting department process the largest (by far) batch of royalty checks in our history, and I wanted to take the opportunity to say thanks to all of you. This year Sourcebooks celebrates 25 years since its one-book founding out of publisher Dominique Raccah’s home. Today we publish 300+ new titles a year across a breadth of categories we never imagined. We have more than 2,000 titles in print from 1,700 remarkable authors. We’ve celebrated 27 New York Times bestsellers and more than 50 national bestsellers. And that only happens with the support and partnership of people like you.

As many of you know, making publishing more transparent and less mysterious for authors, readers, and partners is part of our mission. To wit, some notes from our results in Q1 of 2012:

· Our sales continue to grow, up 17% in Q1 despite fewer retail storefronts. This is all coming off a standout 2011 that was once again the best in our history.

· Although industry news is reporting a marked flattening of ebook sales (up 9.9% in February), ours are up 73% over prior year. Our marketing strength is a real asset in an ever-cluttered space for consumer discovery.

· Our print sales are up 3%. Yes, print, even in a Borders-less world.

· Our top 5 areas of sales are, in order: romance fiction; adult nonfiction; adult fiction; children’s books; young adult. It’s worth noting that we weren’t even in romance, children’s, and YA just 5 years ago.

As 2012 evolves, we continue to experiment on behalf of our authors.

· We recently launched an “online readers club” in the romance space called Discover a New Love that is generating some interesting news and data on what our readers are looking for, specifically experimenting in the areas of reader discovery and DRM (or the absence thereof) .

· “To free or not to free?” We’ve experimented and published some results on the impact of “free” promotions, and we’re seeing the results in this area change almost monthly.

· We’re testing an “agile publishing model” in adult nonfiction with Digital Book World headliner David Houle.

· As we have for 14 years, we’re continuing to deliver remarkable enhanced book experiences for readers – now entirely digital – and in the areas of poetry, adult nonfiction, and children’s books.

For those of you attending BEA this year, we’ll have several editors there and we’re looking for great new projects. Drop us a line, we’d love to see you! I’ll be there, as will Deb Werksman, Leah Hultenschmidt, Shana Drehs, Aubrey Poole, and Steve Geck. Who says publishers don’t bring editors to BEA anymore!

· You can find our catalogs online at www.sourcebooks.com/catalogs.html

· We recently overhauled our page for agents showing our acquiring editors and their interests. We hope you’ll find it to be much more thorough (plus photos!): http://www.sourcebooks.com/resources/editorial-contacts-for-agents.html

It’s been a remarkable 25 years for us. We’ve been able to do a lot of things we were told independent publishers couldn’t do. And we’re looking to continue to take leadership and drive innovation for authors in the next 25. We couldn’t have done it without all of you. We hope to hear from you soon!

Best Wishes,

Todd Stocke

Vice President, Editorial Director

Congratulations to recent New York Times bestselling authors Jill Mansell, Kristi Yamaguchi, Tim Bowers, Harlan Cohen, Grace Burrowes, Susanna Kearsley, Carolyn Brown, Mike Litwin and Jennifer Fosberry!

Our New York office has moved! The new mailing address is 232 Madison Ave., Suite 1100, New York, NY 10016. All phone, fax, and emails remain unchanged.